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Saturday, November 8, 2014

5 Most Memorable Dates this year

I have been on terrible dates and I have been on great dates.I have been on pleasant dates as well as disastrous gun-to-the-head dates. The title of this post entails my top 5 most memorable dates this year. Yes, the dates I will tell you about are memorable but they could either be in a good or bad way. In most cases in a bad horrible traumatizing way, and in others, a good way. To clarify, I don't date much. After the horrible breakup I had three years ago, I lost all faith in men and would rather not get into anything. Cumulatively, in the past 3 years I have gone on less than 10 proper dates. I'm serious when I say this. Not Joking. It's not for lack of good looks (*Ahem* I'm a bombshell, thank you very much), but rather for lack of trying or bothering.

Dating is probably the cruelest game that anyone can play. More often than not, most dates usually end up in uncertainty and mixed feelings or in some very rare cases, regret and resentment. Only very few dates will end up in positive feelings towards that person. It is also a known fact that dates can either be implicit, i.e. both parties assume/hopes it's a date, but it hasn't been outwardly stated that they are on a date, or explicit i.e. both parties are aware that they are on a date and one of them have outwardly stated that this is a date.

Seeing as I've just started slowly getting back on the date wagon this year, I'd like to recount the five people I've been on dates with so far this year. Their identities will be concealed to protect their dignity and save face so here we go!

1) William
William was a Scandinavian guy that I'd met off Tinder (back when I still had an account there). He was not so bad looking, pretty decent profile description and his opening line was very simple ("Hey there, beautiful! Wanna go out for a drink?"). Everything I described about him was in relation to the photos he posted on Tinder. In person, he was short-er than me, had long blonde surfer hair that was tied back into a sleazy ponytail and as bad as this makes me look, he didn't look like he had very good hygiene. That is to say he smelled pretty bad, beard looked like it hadn't been brushed or washed and had the breath equivalent to King Tutankhamen's thousands of year old toilet.I almost reeled in disgust when he came close to me and started to speak.

Admittedly when I first spied him in the corner, I wanted to run away but I woman'd up and reassured myself that it was his character that counted.... which brings me to how the date went. The date was a disaster up until the moment he started speaking. He was is very creepy. He has these eyes that just rove up, down and around my entire body. Overall it was a bad date and I really wanted to get out of there. We wrapped it up in 2 hours and (finally) we parted ways and never spoke to each other again.... or so I thought! The next morning, I received a text from him describing how he had a great time and all that and I expressed my gratitude at being able to meet him and blah blah. Then he did the one thing I despise- he wrote how much he wanted to kiss me and have sex with me. That was the last time we ever communicated up until today. 

2) Kaleb
Kaleb is another guy I met on Tinder, from Poland and he looked really hot in his Tinder photos. All dark featured, and built and all that. But in person, he was just normal. He's working in my city as an Oil and Gas systems something at the biggest Oil and Gas company in my current country. When he first shouted me out he was sarcastic and a fucking douchebag too. But strangely, instead of blocking him, I was immediately riveted to his profile and continued talking to him. We went out on 3 dates and they all ended very swimmingly. None ended in a kiss because I felt like we were more suited to being friends than anything more. Up until today, Kaleb ad I do occasionally hang out and communicate because we honestly connected very well. But as I stated before, we are more suited to being friends. I just realised that I could not like him any more than just being friends. That was it. Nonetheless I made a good friend and meeting him was definitely memorable.

3) Oliver
Oh Oliver, sweet, sweet Dutch Oliver. Oliver and I met when I was over in Singapore for a vacation at the beginning of the year and it was mostly coincidental and NOT from Tinder.  I was at that phase in my life whereby I wanted to be a lone traveler and explore the world on my own. I had been to Singapore prior to that but never alone. So I went there by myself and started sightseeing. It was while waiting for the line at a tourist attraction there that Oliver and I locked eyes. We awkwardly looked at each other and then he approached me. Hence, we started talking and decided to tour Singapore together. It was amazing... until I found out that he was FUCKING RICH (Just to clarify, I don't care about a guy's money)! He had a driver that drove him everywhere and paid for everything with a card. It was fun while it lasted since the next day he had to leave to the Netherlands. But then I met him again and again after that as he occasionally visits my town. I'd say we are more friends than anything else and I'm so glad I got to introduce him to my life. 

4) Ivan
This was by far one of the most memorable dates that I could ever have gone on (save for the few that I've mentioned in previous posts). I met him on a couchsurfing website (please Google it- too lazy to describe it).Ivan is by far one of the funniest, charming as well as handsome men that I've ever had the grace of knowing. He's from Ireland and (thankfully) Doesn't look like a leprechaun. We spent one day touring the city and yet I still remember him up until today as does he. We basically pulled pranks on people, laughed at people and had plenty of fun. I have never forgotten that day and never will forget that day! He even gave me online Irish Skype lessons! We do chat every once in a while now and hopefully when I embark on my year long Euro trip in the near future, I will be able to meet him and catch up.

5) Jake
Jake, if you're reading this, I'm sorry for being brutally honest, so read at your own risk. 

Now, Jake and I met about two months ago and for the full story of our date, visit this link. He's from Manchester in the UK and I met him on OkCupid. So far we've been on an uncountable amount of dates and so far they've all went well. Now here comes the crushing blow, the first time I met him, when we were out on our first date, I didn't think I would be going out with him again. He smoked (trying to quit now) and that put me off. Very much. But when he asked me out again, the next day, I figured why not? He had been a great guy save for the smoking bit and up until today I am so glad I said yes. And everyday after that, I've always anticipated hanging out with him. Why? Because he's wonderful. Kind. Pleasant. But broken. Broken in the sense that he is still trying to latch himself away from his ex and whatnot and I do believe that my role right now would be to support him and give him the time he needs in order to rebuild himself. Establish himself. Not be a selfish bitch about it. That's how these things work. And that's how positive results come by.

I would say these mixtures of good/bad dates have taught me a lot about what to expect in the future when it comes to dating. It also gave me some experiences worth writing about :) Hopefully the dating future will hold mystical wonders and nautical misdemeanors for me . Until then, au revoir.

For F*ck's Sake! Where Has Our Humanity Gone?

Good afternoon world and welcome to #RantHour. #RantHour is a moment in a post whereby I basically complain about the moral wrongs of society, the government and people in general whilst questioning the humanity in some people. #RantHour might even consist of some heated opinions that I will share in regards to food, life and the class system today. As political and boring at that sounds, worry not! I have always pledged to make anything I write sound interesting and less painful to your eyes because I care about my readers (yes, even you who accidentally stumbled upon this blog). 

Today's issue I would like to rank about is quite close to home. I'd like to bitch about the blatant disregard for the disabled in society. Where I'm currently living, it's not strange to see one or two mentally challenged individuals walking on the streets. But when these mentally challenged individuals have to work for a living without any support from the government whatsoever, it becomes a major issue in my eyes. Maybe to some, I'm making a big deal out of virtually nothing but I do believe that these people need to have a certain stature in society. 

They shouldn't be neglected at all. They shouldn't be reduced to doing odd jobs on the streets just to feed themselves. At the same time, face major abuse on the streets by people who are fucking heartless little shits who should have their genitalia chopped off for their negligence. They need some sort of aid from the government or at least some kind of functional system that also works for them so that they are able to make a living not from doing odd jobs on the streets. Isn't it enough that these people are already going through their own daily personal struggles? Must they be subject to street abuse and neglect all because they are trying to survive? Why isn't anyone doing anything about it? 

In the country I'm currently living in, the government would rather increase the price of fuel by 20cents and then siphon that money into their own personal pockets rather than allocating at least 5cents of that into a very small fund that can be used to provide for these people. Or perhaps into building a center that caters to these people as they are human and shouldn't be ignored because they can't speak up for themselves. I wish there was something that I could personally do about it but unfortunately as a foreigner here, my freedom is speech is very restrictive and could cost me my life or life in prison. 

It infuriates me how silent the people are! They are either too afraid to speak or too ignorant to give a fuck. I just wish someone would speak up and defend the honor and rights of these unfairly treated souls. They deserve better than this. They definitely do. Now, before you start giving me shit about, "Hey, why don't YOU do it!?" or "Stop talking about it and do something already!", I'd have you know that I mentioned the repercussions of me voicing out my opinion in this country so unless you suddenly turned blind mid-reading, I suggest you re-read this post and find it. *Smiles*

As I type this paragraph, I am currently working on uniting my friends and coming up with a proposal we can present to the humanitarian aid societies here in this country and then they can work towards raising this issue with the Government. Hopefully everything works out because I don't think I can take another minute of this atrocity, injustice and unfairness. For those of you who have been freaked out by the humanitarian side in me, don't be. As shocking as it might be to you all,  I have always been someone who likes to see a better world for everyone. This means taking part in environment saving activities and etc. So once in a while, instead of those posts concerning my unsuccessful love life and misdemeanors, you will see humanitarian posts like this.

[I am currently working on a pledge to save the Wolves in North America who are being hunted down and killed by poachers for no reason at all.]

Hopefully I can get this achieved by next year. Wish em luck, peeps! 

Friday, October 17, 2014

That's Just How I Feel

Hello readers and fellow bloggers from all the rounded corners of this world (and beyond... ok, even the squared corners). If you're a racist, racially inclined or have a dictator as your role model then leave now. Leave before my brilliant writing sucks you into a reading frenzy as this post is all about interracial breeding...I mean, interracial stuff. Today I'll be talking about something that is very close to my heart. Something that is very valuable to me and defines me. Ladies and gents,  I'd like to talk about interracial dating. Nowadays, it's pretty normal to see plenty of interracial couples with even cuter interracial kids. The rate at which this has increased over the years is overwhelming to the point that it is now normal. 

Previously, when seeing someone new, one's friends would usually assume that she/he is dating someone of the same race.  Nowadays, it's become normal to ask them if their partner is of the same race. Crazy huh? In a good way. Now I have always been a very strong advocate of interracial dating/relationships/whatever-the-arrangement-was, and I have condemned  those who believe that it's the worst thing ever! I have always been supportive and encouraging of those that decide to pursue someone of a different race because I believe that it is beautiful to be accepting of each other in that way. It particularly makes me happy to see such couples. I'm not a creep or anything... its just... It warms my heart? (Ok, I sound so creepy!) 

Sitting on this train, my mind wanders and ponders on my predisposition  towards interracial dating/relationships. (Also, trying to remember the lyrics to a particularly engaging Indonesian song). I guess for me, it all started back in high school. Because I wasn't living in my native country, I attended  an international school at the country I was residing in. And this particular country back then (circa 2002) did not have much immigrants, hence making me and my brothers the only obvious Africans there until they started trailing in like spilled rice. So being the only African  there meant only white/Chinese/Indians were present. The Chinese didn't appeal to me (their eyes had nothing to do with it neither did their um... small size), nor did the Indians (I'm talking Tamil Indians who were the closest to Africans in my high school). So my only candidates for crushes were white guys which, to be honest, weren't exactly easy to come by considering most of them came for exchange programs and were only interested in overly excessive Asian girls. Dicks. 

TV also cultivated my attractiveness preference. It shaped the people I found attractive and appealing.  Soon, I started to like white guys. Honestly, there's nothing special about them. It's not like they have extra organs, or look any better than any other guy or glow in the dark (Note to Self: Find out if this is true  ASAP). It's just that I personally find them attractive. Seriously, in my entire life, all the men and boys I've had crushes on were white (or africast/mixed race). My first boyfriend was German and very white and so was my next boyfriend who was Bosnian and very white too. 

Now, to clarify to the uneducated neanderthals who still thing interracial dating is fucked up- just because I prefer white dudes doesn't mean that I hate my own race. I don't. That is the plain and simple fact. It's sad that so many black men who have tried to pursue me use this as the justification to why I rejected them. Uh, no I didn't reject you because you are blacker than Wesley Snipes (True Fact: In an unnamed worldwide survey, Wesley Snipes was found to be the blackest darkest human being alive, with Akon coming in second and Mario Balotelli coming in third)**. In fact, I rejected you because you are a pompous, cocky, gold chain wearing, narcissistic women objecting JERK. That is it. Of course there are white guys who are even worse but then again it's not about racism- it's about preference.

Now before you sensitive fools start ranting on about, "Oh no you didn't just say shit about Wesley Snipes!" or "That's racist! You can't say that!"... um... hold up. I am not making fun of these people and even if it seems like I am, I'm only stating something that is true. Do you see Wesley Snipes bitching about it? No. Then Zip it. Also, in my personal opinion, the black guys who approached me are domineering little shits who think a woman's place is restricted to the kitchen and that her opinions were the equivalent of toilet paper and the white guys I've met, went on dates with and hung out with are oodles nicer, charming and actually value women.

Another inspiration for this lengthy and very entertaining read is that I am currently in a mutual arrangement with, no, seeing....no that doesn't sound right either. Yes! Dating this guy. Nothing's official yet but things are slowly progressing, hopefully for the better. This guy I'm seeing is Jake** - he was mentioned in this post- and he is a Caucasian male. I am a Negroid female. You see the relation to this post right? Ultimately I've always been pro-interracial relationships, and will always be pro-interracial relationships. I can't help it because that's just how I feel.

My opinionated posts bring out the devil in everyone, and due to this I'd like to say that this is all from my perspective and last time I checked, I had this thing called freedom of expression and speech. I'm allowed to voice out my concerns, views and stories. If you don't like it/disagree with it or are just bitching, then go read some lame blog about how to keep your relationship interesting after years. What do you think of interracial relationships? Are you pro or no?  Email (at the form at the bottom of the page) or comment your views.

**Names have been protected to conceal the real identity of the person/people mentioned and also, their real name is none of your business. 

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Love at First Sight...and Smell

Hello beautiful people! Today is a good day, a great day... a stupendous day! If only I could use all the adjectives in the dictionary to describe how I'm feeling. From the moment I locked eyes ... I just knew... That we would create something beautiful someday. We would be a powerful combination. We would rule the world. Right there, that moment at the mall, I spied with my little eye... something so prominent among everything else similar to it;  something that haunted my dreams up until today. Something...I have come to love. Oh, I just can't take it anymore! I have to tell why I am so smitten! Wait, I'll show you the main cause of this intense affection and love. Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you to the object of my desires...
 People, meet Rogue (Oh Rihanna's pretty too). Rogue by Rihanna is the perfume of all perfumes. It's the one thing that I am craving right now. The one thing that I am currently obsessed with. The one thing that has consumed me ever since I sampled it that one time at the mall. I'm a perfume fanatic, obsessed with smelling good or anything that smells good. My current perfume choices are those that have vanilla undertones and some sandalwood. But there's just something about that Rogue perfume that is just so... intoxicating.It's fun, sexy, seductive... It's that one thing I need right now to make my life complete.

I do not like this perfume simply because Rihanna created it, I like it because the smell is just amazing. Magical. Marvelous. There I go falling in love again! I have searched high and low for this perfume in Malaysia but it has always been out of stock and a tad too freaking expensive at around RM500- last time i checked-(seriously?! Why are the good ones always so darn expensive?!?). Anyway, the main purpose of this post is to introduce you guys to my perfume themed obsession. Updates about my life will be coming soon!

For more Rihanna perfumes visit THIS LINK (Now I'm doing some unpaid PR for Rihanna).

Monday, September 22, 2014

Black Swans and New Experiences

Hello readers (And those that accidentally stumbled upon this blog while searching for something else)! As peculiar as the title of this post might seem, I am indeed writing about black swans and new experiences and yes, they are both related. In my entire, 26 earth years (I read somewhere that a humans' age changes depending on what planet they happen to be in, i.e on Earth I am 23 but on Mars I am 12... kinda explains a lot of my behavior), I have never, ever seen a black swan. To be honest, I didn't even know they existed! I even consulted my Holy Book of All Animals in Existence and even they didn't mention it! I've either stumbled upon a very rare discovery of a new species of the Cygnus Cygnus (which is the Latin name for Swan?).

This Is Us Feeding The Greedy Swans
Many of you are probably wondering... how did I stumble upon such beautiful enigmas? Well it all started with a text message from someone who will be named Jake**. It was a fine Friday morning/afternoon when I first got a message from Jake. If my memory served me correct, I remembered exchanging a bevy of messages with Jake prior to this but I could be wrong. Anyway, due to this epiphany, I remembered not responding to his request of taking me out. I'm not an evil bitch at all. It's just the timing was the worst ever and I honestly didn't want to create excuses. Now that the timing was great, I went for it and accepted his invitation to have lunch. (Hold your horses! I'll get to the swans in a bit!)

So we went out the Sunday, drove around town and had some excessive Arab food. Then we cruised around and generally had a great time! Today (Monday), I received a very unexpected text from him late in the afternoon. It was unexpected because I honestly didn't expect him to want to hang out with me again. I was a cornucopia of awkwardness when we hung out on Sunday! But I was glad that he did invite me out to have a bite with him at this lake resort area opposite my apartment and that was where we encountered the swans! Sunday night gave us two swans, but Monday evening blessed us with a herd(?)! I was so excited I couldn't give my camera a break! I just kept snapping photos until I was satisfied that I had the photos I wanted. After my NatGeo moment, another one surfaced when a Grey Heron viciously swooped into the water and pecked the life out of a poor fish. 

The First Swan We Saw

The Second Swan We Saw
And Then There Was More!
All in all, it was a great day and I'm so glad that I decided to hang out with Jake because I got to see black swans, and of course because he is such a cool person to hang out with! Oh? And did I mention that today ended with a kiss? A very unexpected one. Now before you start thinking I'm a hoe or all that, let me make it clear that I am not a serial kisser. Heck, in my entire life, I've only kissed... *counts*...hey, why should I even tell you this? What matters is that I don't kiss random guys. Just guys I have a connection with. And are Cute. Which isn't every single guys I meet. Jeez. 

Friday, September 12, 2014

iPhone 6


Photo Courtesy of Apple.com
Hello bloggers and readers from all around the world! Today's post will be something a little different from what I usually write about. This post will be all about the new Apple iPhone 6! I have yet to do a technology inclined post so let this be the first. I'm not sure how many of you guys actually watched the launch (yeah, the one with 'Scarf Dude' who is now the brunt of all internet jokes and most importantly, memes), but it was quite interesting and as always, excruciatingly BORING. I mean, for God's sake, it was just yammering, and yammering, blah blah blah, and more yakking. Please keep in mind that this isn't the first Apple live launch I've seen. I've watched two prior to this one and as much as it kills me to admit this, Steve Jobs actually gives a much better presentation than Scarf Guy and Co. 

Anyway, this week, we got a good look at the new, monolithic iPhone 6 and its fat brother the iPhone 6 Plus with the addition of a new product, the revolutionary Apple Watch... which is somewhat the exact replica of the Samsung Gear....um... which was released on September 2013...so...yeah. Now being a faithful Android user (Samsung floats my boat), I wasn't as excited as everyone else in the world for the release of these new products. I just wanted to see how it would look like considering I've seen plenty of misleading photos and videos showcasing fake specifications of these phones. 

To my disappointment, the design is terrible and is, straight up, suspiciously similar to the "Bigger, the Better" Samsung complex. Apple had decided to go bigger, evidently breaking the traditional small and compact design that it previously had. Regardless of it's slimmer and sleeker look, both phones have gotten a little too bulky. The Apple Watch on the other hand might as well be the lesser known twin of the Samsung Galaxy gear. It doesn't have half the specifications that the Gear has but is almost twice as expensive in some countries. You can visit >>THIS LINK<< to see a better comparison between the two, since this isn't a promotional post for Apple or Samsung. 

Photo Courtesy of Apple.com

Another thing that irritated me about these new iPhone is the camera. It's still 8MP and the developers refuse to change this. I don't understand why Apple is adamant on limiting the user's photo capturing horizons but stubbornly sticking with an 8MP camera when they can outdo Samsung and add a 15MP camera! Now that's a phone I'd buy in a heartbeat! Despite all this the iPhone 6's features are pretty impressive albeit only being minutely, slightly better than the iPhone 5S. Software-wise, to get the iPhone 6 experience sans the size upgrade, just upgrade from IOS 7 to IOS 8. There. Simple. Unless you are the adventurous type (or born with a silver fucking spoon) then I say go for it! And don't cray when it slips out of your hands and crashes on the pavement. *Smiles* Oh but don't forget, never upload your nudes to iCloud!
Photo Courtesy of Apple.com


DISCLAIMER: This is NOT a promotional post on behalf of Apple and/or it's products unless stated otherwise. This is an opinion post, strictly written from a my perspective.

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Best. Date. Ever.

Hi my fellow, beautiful, amazing, fantastic readers! Yes, indeed I am in a great mood today due to the beautiful events that occurred to me earlier today. So remember that Scottish guy that I met on Tinder who I briefly mentioned in the previous post? Well for those of you who missed it, I met this amazing guy on Tinder two months ago and we have gone on two dates prior to the recent one yesterday. 


Yesterday/This morning's date was literally the best date I have ever been on in my entire, sad and almost non existent dating life. It was almost magical and definitely unforgettable. He was very kind, nice, funny and very, very good company. We started off the night with going to a very famous Skybar in the city center and despite not finding seats and finally moving onto another bar, he was happy that I took him there and showed him the place. We moved to a different rooftop bar/restaurant and sat down for drinks when we were interrupted by someone who couldn't take a hint that we were on a date. The guy overstayed his welcome until we left him to a group of other people and then moved on with the date.

We then moved to another bar and had a few drinks there (non-alcoholic for me), danced the night away  until we took a break and stood outside. We talked for a bit until I caught him staring at me. Helped by my 4.5 inch wedge heels, I was standing almost level with him (he's 6ft 3inches and I am only 5ft 6inches) so when he moved closer to me there wasn't any hassle about craning my neck. He looked into my eyes and then leaned down to plant a kiss on my lips. Finally! I wanted him to kiss me when we went on our second date but I guess he was too nervous and had too much respect for me to do it. The kiss was so good. It lasted a while before he pulled away, stroked my face and kissed me again. 

Basically when we got the chance to be close, he would kiss me as much as he could. At one point he moved from my lips to kissing my neck and lightly massaging it. The one thing I noticed about him while we were kissing is that his hands always stayed on my face and never ventured to explore my body like most guys' hands usually do. He was always caressing my face and stroking my cheekbones and the closest he ever got to my body was placing his hands on my waist. I liked this very much because it showed that he wasn't trying to rush into getting a good f**k out of me. The night ended with another kiss and I went home smiling wider than the Cheshire cat. 

To be honest, I secretly have high hopes for this thing to work out but at the same time I don't want it to proceed in case it goes jarringly wrong and I have to go all emo again and swear off guys. I mean, I'll never ever tell him this but I really like him. So much. I don't want to like him so I can protect myself from being hurt but I can't help it at all. It's something I can't avoid. 

Hopefully, more will happen after the pending fourth date and hopefully I can finally get closure in the whole sad, 23 year old-single-woman thing.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

The Magical World of Tinder

Hi there blogiverse and my darling readers and critics as well! I know that it's been forever since I've updated this blog but I have a very justified reason for that. I have been very busy trying to normalize my work hours which have been very crazy! Suffice to say that I have even started working on the weekends too! I guess I'll be going through this up until the end of this year. Now, for those of you who are frequent readers of my blog and most of the posts here, you would know that I have been dropping in and out of the dating game.
 
Seeing as I'm a human being with working limbs and the flawed tendency to get sucked into social media trends, I've admittedly employed the help of popular mobile dating apps such as OKCupid, Badoo and Tinder. Badoo is full of stalkers and weird people (at least where I live) and OkCupid is lame and boring (though I did meet someone who turned out to be a very good friend now). I believe you're all familiar with this fancy schmancy little mobile app called Tinder . Tinder is originally a hook-up mobile app used by single people (and on the rare occasion- married people who are 'looking for a good time' or just can't stand each other) who crave sex/some fun while in town or something short term. Tinder can also be used to find like minded spirits with whom you can share a coffee with.To be honest, I have found close friends on this app plus I have gone on some pretty awesome dates.

Before I explain to you the pros and cons of using Tinder, I'd like to explain to you how this app works. In order to have a Tinder account, you must have a Facebook account because it uses all your information from there and photos to create a profile for you. I have tried to find a way to create a standalone profile but haven't found it. For those who are worried that Tinder might post something that would show your friends that you *ahem* use this app, worry not. Tinder does NOT post anything to your wall- ever! After everything has been created and photos set, then it will scan around your location for people who might interest you and all you have to do is swipe left to reject them and swipe right to accept them and start chatting. The good thing about Tinder is that you only chat with those who you have swiped right (and if they like you too and you both match).



Phew. Now that we have gotten that out of the way let's proceed to some pros and cons that I faced while using Tinder. One of the pros of using Tinder is that I am in control. I choose who I want to speak to and I decide who I want to meet with. It's not like OkCupid or any other site whereby any random sicko can send me a disturbing message without bounds until I had to block them . Another good thing about Tinder is that it's so easy to use! It's just a matter of swiping right or left. But the disadvantage in this is that there are times in which I found myself on a "No" streak and kept swiping left until I accidentally swiped a hot guy left. That is the most frustrating thing that can ever happen to you on Tinder: swiping an interesting person left instead of right and never getting a second chance to undo the mistake.

Another frustrating thing about Tinder is that most of the people who use it in my part of the world are tourists and they barely stay in one place. Which is why they are more likely to F**k then hang out. The response rate on Tinder can be pretty bad but the redeeming feature for that is the distance viewer. This way you can see how near or far this person is (and stalk them too). Overall, your experience on Tinder differs according to the people you meet there, but most of them are only looking to screw around. Finding love on tinder is like finding a needle in a tightly congested haystack the size of Africa! This is not to say that it is impossible, it is possible just the possibility isn't very high.

Personally I have met some great guys there of different varieties. Some were tall, some were short. Some were nice and some were rude. Some wanted to have sex at the end of the night and some were honored to just be in my company. Some wanted more than a kiss on the cheek and others were happy to get a hug. When I started using Tinder, I did it out of boredom. My intention was never to meet up with these guys or even speak to them. In fact, I only needed something to kill some time since 9Gag ceased to do that anymore. That quickly transpired into me chatting away with a couple of tourists and acting as a guide who told them where to go and how to make the most of their trip in the city.

The first person I met face to face after avoiding others was this guy from the Netherlands... who later turned out to want much more than friendship and kept bugging me about it until i had to delete him- with a very heavy heart as he was such a great guy. The next guy I met up with turned out to be a stalker and the rest after that were just not floating my boat at all. Coming up to my most recent Tinder date with this Scottish guy, it has been going well. This is one of those moments whereby I was happy I texted him first straight after we matched and relieved when he replied back.

As I am writing this sentence, he and I text almost everyday, share funny stories with each other and actually flirt here and there (and trust me, there has been a lot of flirting going on). We have already been on two dates and I foresee a few more into the future. Ever since we met, I have stopped using Tinder and really don't feel like getting back on that bandwagon anymore. I'd really like to see how this one ends up. Hopefully well.


So to those of you who'd like to try out this app, I say go ahead! It's worth the experience and it could well  help you find your Tinderfella/Tinderella. Good luck and have fun with the app!

**[DISCLAIMER: This post is in no way associated with Tinder or it's partner companies and is strictly written from a heterosexual woman’s perspective and experience while using this app. This is not a promotional post for Tinder unless stated otherwise.]

Thursday, May 29, 2014

10 Things I Should Stop Doing To Myself

Hey world! Today's post is inspired by this article which was written by Marc Chernoff. In this article he basically outlines the many different things that an individual should stop doing to themselves and I realized that ten of these are very true. I won't bore you with a lecture on the specifics that he had outlined but I will write my version of it which will outline how and why I want to stop doing these things to myself. Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to my life. 

1. Stop running from your problems.
I've always run from my problems. Despite advising others to face their problems and stop being such decadent cowards, I still do it. As I am typing this sentence itself, I still run away from my problems. I guess the reason why i do this is because of the fear of failing to tackle these problems which will ultimately lead to my failure. I have so many unresolved issues now simply because I refused to face the music and do the Devil's dance. Working on this would really help me come up with better solutions to my problems.

2. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner.
Yeah... I recently realized that I have a terrible affliction towards helping others while ignoring my own needs. Granted I am not a pushover or anything but I could always try to be selfish at least once. Sometimes I tend to forget that I need to put myself before others and this habit was more apparent in University. I used to volunteer to help my friends out when I knew that I had a really difficult exam the next day or I'd volunteer to do someone's assignment for them because I felt sorry for them. Seriously, I should stop. Marc is right, I need to help myself too, not just others.

3.  Stop trying to be someone you’re not.
How much truer can this be? All my life I have tried to be someone else. This doesn't mean I am a fake person but this only applies to me physically. I've always grown up believing that I was the ugly duckling in my family and that I would never be as pretty as my siblings or my mom too. As I blossomed into a woman I undertook several measures to make myself "prettier" in the eyes of society. I won't lie and say that I've stopped doing this because beauty is an ongoing struggle but I realized that surrounding myself with good people does help me realize my inner beauty which ultimately will reflect my outer beauty too.

4. Stop trying to hold onto the past.
This one strongly relates to my past relationships- both platonic and romantic with people. As shitty as my memory is, I am the kind of person who will never forget an incident that has caused me so much pain and was initiated by a friend/boyfriend. For instance, up until today I remember what my ex told me when he broke things off- "It's not working out and I've found someone much better looking". Boy, did that create a social wedge between me and boys for ,like, ever. And there are a few past grudges that I still hold on to when letting go of them is easier than keeping them. In fact. I'll need to work on this as soon as possible. In the words of Marc, "You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one."

5. Stop being scared to make a mistake.
As a self confessed perfectionist, making a mistake is the bane of my existence. I was raised in an environment whereby perfection is something prudential in my life.  My dad always implied that I had to be perfect in my studies which was great because that made me graduate at the top of my class.... and affected me in other areas too. Nowadays, at work, whenever I'm given a task to perform, I feel like I have  to be perfect at it in order to produce great results and be praised by my boss for a job well done. When Marc says, "Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing", I say "Why should I get it wrong ten times when I can improve upon it after one shot?".

6. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn't work
I am the queen of doing this! I mean seriously, if there was ever a town called "Rejecting-Relationships-Based-On-Past-Failed-Relationships-ville" I would be the designated mayor. I reign supreme when it comes to shutting people off due to what happened previously in a past relationship. This usually happens in my... romantic relationships. To say the least, after my last relationship with that ex , I have never opened up and allowed myself to be in another relationship simply because I am so scared it will turn out like that one. Hopefully in the future I can gain the courage to take that step towards creating something beautiful with that other person.

7. Stop thinking you’re not ready.
I would say that this point applies to both my romantic as well as my professional life. Professionally, at my current age, I feel like I am not ready to be shoved into the hardcore corporate world. I am still comfortable doing a job whereby I don't need to stand out explicitly from the others. Marc has a point, when he says that no one ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises, they just have to take a few steps towards finding a way to handle/accept that opportunity.



8. Stop being ungrateful.
There are times when I used to ask why I didn't have a certain thing or why I wasn't born a certain way but now that I think about it , I realize how stupid I was for ever thinking that way! I have been given so much in my life compared to a large percentage of others in this world! The clothes that I wish i had more of? There are plenty in the world who are void of clothes. The food I barely finished? The kids in Vietnam would give anything to have a taste of what I've wasted. The body I complained about being too fat? at least I was born with a full set of limbs. I need to be more thankful for what I've got because there are others out that who wished they had a fraction of what I have. 


9. Stop being jealous of others.
Growing up in a society whereby everyone is constantly competing with each other was the cause of me being jealous of almost everyone around me. I grew up from humble beginnings and my parents had plenty of kids to support which meant I nearly almost didn't get what I wanted. If I wanted a new dress I'd have to make do with a cheaper dress that wasn't as good as the one I wanted or if I wanted to hang out with my friends my parents would come up with plenty of excuses as to why that couldn't happen. The fact of the matter is, these things made me super jealous of my friends because they could have whatever they wanted without hesitation and everyone always seemed to be doing much better than me. So I grew to develop this jealousy towards whoever had better things than me or were better at something than me. Ultimately it has come to the point that the littlest things that shouldn't make me jealous of a person, in fact, does just that. I guess I need to get back to the same thing I mentioned in point #8 about being more thankful for what I have because there are some people who would give anything to experience this too.

10. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments.
Enjoy the little things, is what Marc advises in his article.Suffice to say I've made myself so busy with the big things that the beauty of the littlest, simplest things have escaped my grasp. Today when I look back at these moments that I've missed, I wish I could turn back time and pay closer attention to them. I've missed so many things that seemed like a small matter to me but meant a lot to those close to me. When Marc says that, "One day you may look back and discover they were the big things" I understand and can relate. Hopefully in this pending second half of 2014, I can find the heart to give precedence over the smaller matters which do in fact make up the most important moments of my life.  

Marc Chernoff has pinpointed 20 other moments but I chose to write about  these ten because they were the ones that I could easily relate to. Now let us have a moment of silence to ponder on our past misgivings and future endearments.

Hope this post inspires you to think of several things you need to stop doing to yourself before it's too late.


Thursday, May 15, 2014

Seriously, When is Winter Coming?








*WARNING- Possible Spoilers Ahead. Read at your own risk for you hath been warned*

Hello old and new readers and welcome to another post by the ever so magnificent and ever so critical... ME! I know it has been a very long while since I have posted anything but this time it wasn't out of laziness or disinterest, but rather out of my super busy schedule at work. ow that I have this very precious free time, I figured... hm.. why not entertain and ensnare the minds of my readers by writing about something close to their hearts. And that is... *drum roll* GAME OF THRONES (GOT)! 

Ok confession time; ever since I stopped watching Spartacus, I swore to myself that I wouldn't succumb to social/TV pressure when it came to watching fantasy HBO series. But then time and boredom were very cruel to me and soon enough, I started running out of shows to watch! I started panicking and then... I saw it. I saw the HBO pop-up promoting Game of Thrones with Daenerys Targaryen and her damn dragons and that was all it took for me to be sucked into the world of castles, wars and yes, of course- DRAGONS.

For those of you simple-minded gents and gentiles who aren't well accustomed to the entire etymology or storyline of Game of Thrones, I'll try as best as I can to explain it to you in not more than 10 scrolls. Just kidding...3 maybe? To begin with, the main point of GOT is that it centers around this super impressive (seriously how in the heck did the producers come up with such an awesome design for a throne?) Iron Throne which is the envy of every warlord in the Seven Kingdoms. This throne has felt the warm asses of the Targaryens (a very old family), King Robert Baratheon, his asshole "son" Joffrey Baratheon and currently plays host to Tommen Baratheon.

So the series focuses on several key characters like The Stark Family, The Lannister Family, The Targaryen family, The Dothraki, a couple of slaves,  the Knight's Watch and last but not least dragons. I won't give away the plot of each and every season but I will tell you this: tits, f*king, incest, castration and cruelty. Those words are enough to make you illegally download this series. Trust me, if you start now, you will catch up since every season only consists of 10 episodes (Almost an hour each).

There are several reasons why I have come to like this show. Firstly, there are many different characters with many despicable and lovable personalities that make this show very enjoyable to watch. For instance, some of my favorite characters include, Tyrion Lannister (Played by Peter Dinklage- I love this character because of his sarcasm and very sharp tongue), Arya Stark (Played by Maisie Williams- her veracity and courage as well as her personal struggles make for great character development), Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish (played by Aiden Gillian ), Lord Varys (played by Conleth Hill), Daenerys Targaryen (played by Emilia Clarke- I liked her at the beginning when she was just starting to gain momentum and her character was starting to develop but recently her vanity and arrogance is starting to tick me off), Khal Drogo (played by Jason Momoa- he is one fearless warlord with brute strength and brings a lot of gore into the show... well until they kill him off *bitches*) and Daario Naharis (originally played by Ed Skrein who was later replaced by Michiel Huisman for no apparent reason- I loved Ed as Daario because he exuded the right kind of sex appeal that Daario has bot Michiel who is just... boring and lifeless).
               
The characters I really dislike are: Cersei Lannister (played by Lena Heady- this incestuous bitch is mother of all bitches who even gave birth to a son who is also a bitch), Joffrey Baratheon (aka Bitch McFuckface played by Jack Gleeson- Although I enjoy watching him being cruel, he is still a major douchebag), Sansa Stark (Played by Sophie Turner- one of the most depressing characters on the show. Jeez, just looking at her makes you want to take your own life. She's one of those characters that won't be missed if she died), and last but not least, Melisandre (played by Carice Van Houten- For God's sake she tried to kill GENDRY, GENDRY!!).

Another reason why I like this show is that despite each of the characters living very far away from each other, they still try to put a spotlight on each character and show their progress throughout the series. I would say the main highlight of the series so far was when Joffrey died (he was poisoned, for which Tyrion is wrongly accused). Other than that, many things seem to be occurring at a very steady pace and the plot continues to thicken. To some of you, this may all seem like Chinese and you'd have no idea who these characters are, or more, so click on this link to find out for yourself or you could always download it and start watching. Oh and one thing about GOT- The fact that it has already reached Season 4 and winter hasn't fucking come yet! In every episode at least one character will mention that "Winter is coming". Well hopefully, winter comes in the next episode or I'll start doing push-ups every time someone mentions it.

I know I could do myself a favor and read the books so I'd be put out of my misery but FUCK NO. I refuse to read the books. I refuse to spoil the entire series for myself. I did that with Harry Potter, Twilight (I wish i hadn't watched the movie and stuck to just the books) and the Lovely Bones and learnt my lesson. So no, I WON'T be reading the GOT books so suck on that George R.R. Martin.

And on that note,



Valar Morghulis

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Things NOT To Do After A (very messy) Breakup

Hi bloggers and beautiful readers and random creeps who stalk this blog! This article is probably long overdue but there is a reason why I want to write about this now. I have been single for almost 3 years now and this has given me a lot of time to analyze myself deeply. It just occurred to me that after my ex and I broke up, I did a number of  things that make me cringe when I think about it now. Also another reason I decided to write this is because once and for all my breakup goggles are off. But what are breakup goggles you ask:

Break-up Goggles: These are figurative (or invisible) goggles that one wears immediately after a breakup and see the world as a depressing place while losing the will to die and/or function.

We all go through breakups, some messy and some similar to the battle scene in 300. But there are ways to properly handle a breakup. I could have just given you a list of things to do after a messy breakup but I realized that there is already an abundance of those lists lying around the World Wide Web. I have come up with 6 helpful tips on things to avoid after going through a messy breakup.

1. Eat Everything

I know, I know, it's really hard not to eat when your life has been turned upside down by the person you thought you were going to have kids with but chill with the snacks! Yes, food was and will always be your best friend in harsh times but for f*ck's sake, this isn't the Depression ok? It's just a breakup! Eating won't bring him back nor will it make you feel better in the long-run. Drinking too, so drinking yourself into oblivion won't change anything except damaging your liver for some guy/girl you broke up with. When you notice your waistline increasing then that would be an eternal reminder of that time your broke up with [insert name here] and ate yourself silly. Also unless you want people to start making Free Willy jokes or Godzilla memes inspired by you- easy on the food. Eat in moderation and remember, a moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips. 




2. Listen to Non-Motivational Music

There are many songs and artists that fall into this category. Some of the more prominent artists that fall into this category are Taylor Swift, Adele, Frank Ocean, and Kelly Clarkson.
These people have sung too many songs about breaking up and Taylor Swift's songs have even encouraged several revenge hints too. Some songs that are good to avoid in this situation are:

- "Boston" by Augustana,
- "Irreplaceable" by Beyonce
- "Song to Say Goodbye" by Placebo
- "F*ck it (I don't want you back)" by Eamon 
- "How Could You Bring Him Home" by Eamon
- "Someone Like You" by Adele
- "40 Kinds of Sadness" by Ryan Cabrera
- "A Little Too Not Over You" by David Archuleta
- "All Good Things (Come to an End)" by Nelly Furtado
- "Leave (Get Out)" by JoJo
- "Big Girls Don't Cry" by Fergie
- "Break Your Heart" by Taio Cruz
- "Come Back to Me" by Vanessa Hudgens 
"Come Back to Me" by Utada Hikaru 
- "Forget You" by Cee Lo Green

Of course there are more songs but these are only the tip of the depression iceberg. Also, refrain from Marilyn Manson, Black Sabbath or any Satanic music that advises you to perform a sacrificial ritual as a form of revenge. 


3. Stalk his Social Networks


Look, it doesn't matter whether he broke up with you because you were suffocating him, or that he did it because he fancies another woman-do not stalk him! Speaking from experience, after we broke up I stalked his Facebook profile right after he changed his relationship status to single and then started monitoring his page to see if any girls would post messages on his wall. All I could say was that it brought me nothing but misery and distress and thinking back, I wish I'd never done it at all. Trust me guys, it's not worth it seeing e.g. Stephanie* posting on your ex-boyfriend's wall/timeline about what a great time she had with him today and could they do it again soon? or Lucas* posting the same thing your ex-girlfriend's wall/timeline. Live and let die, live and let die. 







4. Use breakup quotes, lyrics and poems as the central focus of your status updates. 

We've all done it. We've all posted status updates that very clearly, heck obviously hint at your ex. Whether it was how "I don't need you and can live without you" poems or "Exes are like an appendix- they seem important but aren't" quotes or even "there's plenty of fish in the sea" bullshit, just don't make him/her the central focus of your updates! 
And the worst part is that these insults are so thinly veiled that Stevie Wonder can see them from a mile away! Its these kinds of posts that show your friends and your mutual friends with theirs that: YOU. CLEARLY. HAVEN'T. MOVED. ON. YOU. SAD. PATHETIC. CREATURE. It would be great to stay away from Facebook after the breakup (I know it's hard but just try as hard as you can) to allow some time to cool off and think clearly.


5. Let yourself go

This is the most common behavioral change that one undergoes after a breakup- they stop caring about their appearance, health and overall body image. You have to understand and remember that you did not exist to please your (now) ex-partner. The way you looked before you met them was due to your effort, concern and actually giving a shit about yourself and how you seem to others. Wearing sweatpants and frequenting dark alleys is NOT the way to go. People usually do this because they are convinced that they will nobody will like them so why should they care how they look? For the love of Mike, get off the point of no return and start climbing back to the pedestal of your life. Smelling like you use Chuck E. Cheese as your deodorant doesn't help either. So please, go back brush your teeth twice a day, using proper perfume/deodorant and looking less like Hagrid (for the men) or Peppermint Patty (the females). 


6. Start a new relationship/meet someone new and expect them to commit 

Remember that guy/girl you met a week ago who bough you a drink, danced with you and exchanged numbers with you? And then you guys met again after a week and hooked up and said drunk "I love yous'" and cuddled until the next morning? After that he/she added you on Facebook/Twitter and you notice that he/she recently uploaded photos of them kissing other girls? And then you went on a rant and confronted the, about it and they pointed out that you guys aren't dating so why are you freaking out? Then you blocked him/her and never spoke to them again? Fucking hell, if you recognize this scenario then you have most likely gone through it. Leaping onto a new relationship straight after you've suffered a messy breakup is called a rebound because your feelings right then and there are less than sincere. You either want to fill that empty hole left behind by your ex or you happened to get along with this new person at the wrong time. Just take it slow and be friends for a while before getting into something serious. 



I know that messy breakups are very tough and really difficult to get over but with time a patience you can definitely do it. If you have any breakup stories you'd like to share with me, just drop me an email in the form below and I will try to help you as much as I can. 

Disclaimer: Everything written here is solely based on my experience and doesn't apply to everybody so don't get all fucked up if it doesn't work out for you. Fucking hell! 

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Keeping up with my Resolutions

Hello pals and gals! (I just finished reading an Archie comic so please, excuse my overly enthusiastic undertone) Hope today was a brilliant day for you as it was for me too. Today's blog installment is about an issue that has been very close to my heart for a very long time. My yearly resolutions. Like most of the world's population, every years I follow suit with creating a list of New year resolutions that I vow to keep at the beginning but end up disregarding towards the end of the year. 


This year's resolutions have by far been the best and third month in and I've already found myself getting way too lazy to keep up with them. I'd like to say that New Year resolutions are not as easy to keep as everyone thinks. It's so damn hard and takes a lot of willpower and patience (which I have none to spare) to successfully complete. Instead of writing down my entire list of 20 something things to work on, I've decided to narrow it down to the 5 most important things I prioritized on that list. Suffice to say, it's so hard trying to keep up with these five alone so imagine keeping up with the remaining 15 or more?! So, the five most important resolutions on my list are:

1. Eat More Healthily
2. Work-Out More aka Lose Weight
3. Make an Effort in Dating/Meeting New People
4. Travel More
5. Talk to my Mother more often

Now I'll just let you know the progress of each of these resolutions. Let's begin with the first one, which is:

Eat More Healthily
Everything in this one sentence goes against my beliefs that I can eat whatever I want and not give a care in this world. I am extremely ashamed to say that I have started to fall back on this resolution because unhealthy food is the quickest option and easiest option to satisfy my ravenous appetite. Also the fact that I live very uncomfortably close to an endless stream of fast food restaurants doesn't really help at all. So how did this resolution come about? I was watching this documentary about what really goes on in the fast food business and that really freaked me out for a bit so I took the initiative to change my diet once and for all. I started off with eating once a day (dinner)  and then I realized how terrible that felt and now I'm stuck with having at least a  cup of yogurt and green tea with whatever I'm having. I'd say I'm progressing quite well so far. 

Work-Out More aka Lose Weight
This is insofar the best improvement I've seen so far! I am very proud to say that I have lost 7 KGs at the beginning of this year (Success!). Part of this resulted from drinking green tea whenever I could and having small meals and walking at least 10,000 steps everyday and also stretching too. The reason this is on the top 5 of my resolutions is because I've always had body image issues and I'm the type of girl that is fearful of gaining too much weight (Gee, thanks a lot media!). I was always surrounded by washboard skinny or thin girls with no curves so being the only one out of my friends who has curves sort of brings unwanted attentions to myself. One of the reasons why I prefer to wear baggy clothes or clothes that hide my figure. I do hope that I can reach my goal of losing 20KGs by the end of this year so i can be on my way to that almost perfect body that I've always dreamed of. 

Make an Effort in Dating/Meeting New People
Hahahahaha. This one is the funniest to me. Not a single stride has been made in this area. OK, fine, that doesn't mean that I didn't try at all, because trust me-I did. It's just... it's way too much effort that'll only end in either heartbreak or lack of communication. BUT, I can say that I have made new friends so far into 2014 and they are the funnest people I've ever hung out with. Suffice to say, on the meeting new people front, I'm doing pretty OK, but on the dating front, I really really suck. I don't know why I'm not even bothering to make any strides at all. Dating takes up way too much effort and I like being single because then I won't be able to receive any disgusting teddy bears from boyfriends. The effort I've made so far have come in the form of useless dating apps such as Tinder and OkCupid. All they have gotten me are lewd messages from guys who are too h*rny to control themselves. I have made new friends on those apps too but most of them are more eager to rush into a relationship rather than getting to know someone first. So hopefully by the end of the year I'll develop more interest in that field and actually try to make an effort so I don't end up being a 53 year old cougar who preys on young prepubescent boys. 

Travel More

In my whole life, I've had a dream- to travel around the world and see the world. Unfortunately instead of being born into the Royal family with an endless supply of cash, I was born into a middle class family full of love and caring. I'm joking but on a more serious note finance was never on our side so travelling wasn't a privilege that we were endowed with. And now that I am working, I have been travelling too. So far, I've been to Macau (a country that sounds like it should be in Africa and not Asia but what the heck!), Singapore, Brunei and Thailand. Countries I'd love to travel to are Mexico, Colombia, Brazil, Haiti, Jamaica, London, The UK, Wales, Scotland, Italy, Romania, Germany and many more! I've got plenty more on my list and hopefully that dream will come true soon :D 






Talk to my Mother more often
This is a part of my life that I haven't shared with anyone just yet but most of you don't know who I am so I feel more comfortable sharing this with you guys than saying this to someone who knows me well. Also the probability of you finding out who I am is very limited. The truth is... my parents are separated, have been for a very long time. But we, the kids, only recently found out (they were doing it to protect our interest or whatever). Anyway, 2 years ago, my mother ran away and left us, without any explanation whatsoever, and my brother who was staying with her was abandoned (my brother has Aspergers so he needs constant watching over) so since then I haven't talked to her. It's been 3 years now. I wouldn't mind talking to her but the woman is virtually unreachable. Nobody knows where she is or who she's with. All we get are rumors that she is somewhere. Anyway this resolution entails me to try to track her down and talk to her for the sake of my siblings. Hopefully we do find her soon.


Well ladies and gentlemen, that was it! I hope- as always- that this post didn't bore you to death and that you actually share this with your friends and also let me know what your top 5 new year resolutions are and how far along you've come with them. Feel free to leave comments or share your thoughts with me through the form right at the end of this page. All haters are welcome too! 

So until then, adios, bitchazz!